It was a normal morning….just like
any other day…just in the second period..our bindiyaa maam, announced to
us…that some ppl from the hare rama krishna mission were visiting our school.
And soon they will come to the class. It was of no consequence to me….
There she entered…along with her
associates…..i was just too spell bound….perhaps as much as mira was enamoured
by Krishna..or how majnu went dizzy seeing
laila for the first time. She was an amazing beautiful American sadhvi…from the
kare Krishna mission…and was part of the group
that visited our school. It was love-infatuation-madness at first sight.
Prompted me to shift from the last bench to the first bench. While I was always
curious of god, atma, life…and many a time had posed questions to many….here, I
was more than just interested in answers….i posed my most idiotic questions and
queries…and were answered very nicely by the sadhvi..just when they were
leaving, I went and asked for their address….their numbers..and all….for, I was
interested in meeting them) her_ once again….
It became a weekly routine…I kept
going to the place where she hd halted…a senior hare Krishna mission chair
person….and kept finding reasons to meet her see her….
Was having a turbulence in my
mind…coz I was just pretending that im attracked to the mission, but realty was
I was jus attracted to her….
I attended bhajans, prayers, also
went with her to some other schools…and I was eing introduce as a curious
kid….who had fallen in love with hare Krishna. But me was doing hare radha hare
radha….in my mind….
The madness knew no bounds when I
started sporting a hare Krishna style tikka..on my forehead…when I was out of
school…I bought a lot of books from her…as if I was deeply interested…and I was also talking of love of
Krishna n Radha…and was making imaginary castles wen I knew that radha was much
elder to Krishna in terms of age..and then, thoght if krishna and radha can be
one, why not i. my love is also pure, mad, divine…and much more…
My parents too were flummoxed with
my sudden interest in hare Krishna….my tilak, my collection of books, which I
never read….etc etc…..but they were maybe too sure of my idiosyncracies- one
madness at a time….and hence, they dint bother much….evening they knew I was
going to the hare Krishna temple….so they never even asked…as it had become
routine…for me..
The sadhvi, by the way, never ever
gauged my intentions, why im following her, why
so much communicating with her…for her I was just a kid….not even passed
11th std…and who maybe, she treated as a baccha. But then, like
Malena..the movie….where a small kid was mad after a woman twice her age….i
was reassuring myself all the time…and
visualizing a lot of things…ahead. Of getting married to her….of how our pooja
room I would be…and how she would look as my wife…..
Just one of those usual Sundays
where I were to attend a prayer meet in the evning…and I went to the centre…..shockingly
this American sadhvi wasn’t around. I was restless….i went up to the senior
mataji and asked her point blank…..mataji, where is…..xyz….why is she not
around. Is she ok….is she around…a flurry of questions…..
I was sweating…so much that it
rubbed off my hare Krishna stlle tilak…..
Mataji, very nonchalantly
replied…beta…she had come on tousits visa..and she just left for Bombay last night…she has
a flight to catch back to LA.
I was shocked. Dumbstruck. Completely
blank in my mind.
Couldn’t sleep whole nite.
Constantly….her images kept running
in my mind…..
The next day, I visited the
temple…and just told god….look god, I love her a lot….if u can bring her back
to me, I will then only step into ur
temple once again.
God might have smiled n said- grow
up u idiot….this is ur
12th true love ……
So….go, find ur 13th.
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